Getting Your Spouse On The Savings Wagon
What would you do if you were debt free? How would your choices change? What unforgettable ways of spending money would be yours?
Often one person in a relationship gets on board. They want to intensely cut out all wasteful spending to either pay off debt or increase savings. But the other person in the relationship isn’t feeling it.
My husband and I have been married for over 11 years and live debt free and have for most of our marriage; we’ve fluctuated similarly in our laxness or intensity of adding to savings. But we realize things motivate us differently.
For my husband, it’s providing for our family, it’s retirement, it’s a legacy for our children and grandchildren. (When I confirmed this with him before hitting “Publish”, he said, “yes, and steak and wine.”) For me, retirement sounds a long way off and when I hear “save money for a legacy to pass on to our children and grandchildren” I hear “no fun for us now”. So I assessed what motivates me – for me, it’s unforgettable, memorable things, like family travel, time together, not worrying so much about the unexpected.
What helps keep up your intensity? My suggestion: add up all that you pay out – credit car payments, car payments, cell phone payments, TV monthly bill, etc. – add it all up, and with that number, ask your hesitant-about-saving loved one, what would you rather do with that money? That can be a great motivator to think of spending money that you HAVE rather than spending money that leads you further into the slavery of debt.
My husband and I have our best conversations when on walks together or on drives together. Those are free or nearly free settings that might be a great opportunity to talk over these ideas, these dreams, these goals…and hopefully begin to agree on plans to achieve them.
Pondering the unforgettable ways we can spend money, things like traveling as a family, providing unforgettable experiences and opportunities that we’d otherwise have to pass up, those are things that keep the fire for saving burning for me. What are yours?
Keep at it! One step at a time! You can do this!